Blue Eyes
by It's me get over it
Summary: Hayffie Week Day 5- Angst. Haymitch is haunted by blue eyes. Blue eyes are what broke him. Blue eyes will save him.


A feel a need to say I was originally writing this one for Tuesday's 'the kids', but it took an angsty dark turn (consider yourself warned!). When I'd finished it, in like two sittings too, I realised I couldn't read through it without getting teary. So, I thought it might be best to change the prompt I connect this to. And I know parts of it are _very_ cliché, but that's what came pouring out of my head…

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#hayffieweek #angst #haymitchabernathy #effietrinket #hg

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"What are you doin?!" Haymitch asked the alarm in his voice rising the closer she got to him.

"What does it look like?" she answered, not breaking her stride towards the elder Victor, a devious grin on her face.

"No, stop! No, no, no-"

He continued protesting right until she placed the sleeping baby in his arms. Haymitch froze.

He stood there frozen looking around the room in panic. Katniss looked sympathetic, but there was no way she was taking the baby off him. Both Peeta and Annie smiled, no doubt not believing his cry of protest. And Jo, well she just stood back and was basking in his discomfort.

Then the boy woke. No doubt disturbed by the ridged way the man was holding him. He didn't immediately start fussing, but squirmed looking around. Suddenly the ex-Mentor relaxed and he held the babe in the comfortable and natural way he'd been shown earlier. Seam grey locked with light blue.

The other Victors were shocked as the boy gave a content sigh and continued to study the man holding him. What was even more surprising was the transformation the grown man went through.

His eyes didn't leave the baby's, and an unconscious smile crossed his face. The baby gave a soft coo to him and they were stunned to realise Haymitch's eyes were misting over.

"Hey, buddy," he spoke softly when the baby paused in his cooing.

The boy immediately became more vocal in his happy noises and a watery chuckle escaped Haymitch. He responded to the child's noises and it was clear the two were lost in their own private world.

The moment was shattered when something from outside made a loud noise, possibly one of the geese next door, causing Haymitch to look up. His eyes widened like a deer caught in the headlights when he remembered the others were there.

Quickly he handed the baby boy back to Annie and he fled out the back door grabbing a bottle of alcohol on his way.

The only noise in the house after his departure was the fuss baby Fin was making at his sudden relocation to his mother's arms. The adults all looked between each other still slightly stunned.

"What the-"

"Jo!" Annie cried, drowning out the other woman's curse.

"-was that? What just happened to Haymitch?"

"I don't know. I've never seen him act like that," Katniss admitted, shrugging. She tried to hide it but Haymitch's change had unsettled her.

"His eyes looked like he wasn't entirely here when he was holding Fin," Annie commented, having calmed her son down.

"Annie's right," Peeta agreed with a nod. "He looked like he was lost in a memory."

"He looked ready to cry. Haymitch never cries," Katniss added.

"Well, that settle it," Jo declared.

"Settles what?"

"Lover boy will have to go talk to him."

"Wait- what? Why do I have to go talk to him? You've known him longest!"

"You're not that idiotic to think he would actually talk emotions with either me, or your bird-brain girlfriend, are you?"

"We're not dating!" Katniss protested.

"See? She's so clueless she _still_ can't see what's between you two. If anyone here stands a chance, it's you," Jo explained, her annoyance at having to explain things obvious.

"Okay," Peeta agreed headed for the door that led outside. "But I can't guarantee he'll talk to me."

"There was only ever one person who could," Annie commented.

"Yeah well, she isn't here, is she?" Jo snapped irritably.

Annie just looked down at son sadly. "I wish she was."

"Yeah, there are a lot of people I wish were still here."

Jo stormed out of the room into the rest of house, clearly letting them know she was done.

"I'll go see if Haymitch is willing to talk," Peeta softly commented leaving.

He didn't have far to go. Haymitch could be seen sitting on his back porch bottles of alcohol scattered within his reach. He'd obviously collected a few from inside and returned out there. Peeta headed towards him slowly, making sure to make noise enough to warn the other man of his approach.

"You draw the short straw?" Haymitch asked, his eyes fixated on his bottle. "Or did you volunteer again, boy?"

"One of those," Peeta agreed with a shrug.

"I ain't up for talking," Haymitch dismissed the unasked offer, finishing the bottle.

"I think you are," Peeta countered, sitting on the edge of the porch. "If you wanted to be left alone you'd be drinking in your house. But you're not; you're drinking out here."

"I can't drink in there, its too damn quiet," the elder man admitted throwing the empty bottle at his geese pen.

The birds honked their protest loudly, breaking the silence of the night.

"That's why you got the geese," Peeta mused. He eyed his ex-Mentor, sizing him up and decided to play a hunch, "Effie would've hated them."

The reaction as instant; Haymitch straightened and the new bottle in his hand froze half way to his mouth. Seam grey eyes sharply looked across the yard to the pen, but Peeta could see the look within them was hard, but brittle. Haymitch was close to breaking.

"So, what was that back there with Fin?"

The senior victor took a long swing of his drink, avoiding answering.

"You seemed almost comfortable with him. Have you been holding babies without telling any of us?"

Finally their eyes met and Peeta saw the fire dissipate within them before him.

"Why do your eyes have to be so… so _blue_? That's all I see when close my eyes _their blue eyes_."

Now Peeta was confused. "Who?"

"Effie and Leo."

He'd suspected there was something more than they were ever told between their Mentor and Escort, but who was the other?

"Leo?"

Haymitch cast Peeta a side glance and the young man's heart nearly broke at the look of loss and pain in the elder's watery gaze. Whoever Leo was Haymitch had loved them. Very much.

"Leonidas Peeta Abernathy. My-" Haymitch's voice caught.

Peeta saw him close his eyes. In the dark of the evening he saw a stolen tear make its way down the man's cheek, only visible by the trail of liquid glistening in the faint moonlight.

" _Our son_."

The young blue eyed man remained still in a stunned silence as the elder grey eyed man struggled to get his emotions under control. Deep ragged breathes could just be heard, hidden by the honking of the geese.

So many questions were spinning through Peeta's head. He wanted to ask, but at the same time he wanted to give Haymitch some earned peace. Silence remained between them while Haymitch polished off another bottle.

As he reached for his third the younger picked up his own bottle and softly ask, "Tell me about him?"

Haymitch threw him a questioning look. Peeta looked at him with genuine interest but no expectation.

"Please?" he asked after taking his first sip, of what he discovered to be red wine.

Haymitch let out a frayed sigh.

"He was early, as impatient as his mother." Haymitch tried to laugh at his own feeble joke, but it chocked him in his throat.

He kept talking before Peeta prompted him, "The day we took the Mansion. He was… he was too early. There were … complications. Effie'd been too stressed, too strained. I almost lost her that day, but they managed to put her in a coma instead.

"Leo was put in one of those box things and attached to machines. There were so many machines around him. And he was so _little_ …"

Haymitch faded off, but Peeta didn't say anything as the man engrossed in a memory looked at the bottle in his hands like it was his lost child.

"This bottle is bigger than he was."

"What was he like?" Peeta softly prompted, his throat feeling tight and his wine wasn't helping.

"He… he was Seam. He had Seam colouring. A bit of dark hair, like mine but his eyes," Haymitch closed his eyes again, "his eyes were Effie. They had her shape, and," another tear escaped silently, "and they were so _blue_. A blue no one in Twelve has ever had. He… he was a perfect blend of us.

"He never left that room. His heart and lungs gave out on him before he reached a week."

Silently, both men drank from their bottles.

"Effie never saw him alive," Haymitch eventually finished. "She woke up two days after he died. She cried for days, was almost put in another coma. Then Coin tried to put her trial and well, I think you know the rest."

Peeta didn't comment just took a few long sips of his wine. He was surprised to realise it was to close to empty. Getting to his feet he felt his head spin but in the light-headedness a resolve swept through him.

"Haymitch, what really happened to her?" Peeta asked.

"She died," was the response spat at him.

"I know _that_ ," Peeta snapped back. "I asked what really happened to her. She was more like a mother to me in the year and a half I knew her than the woman who gave birth to me was for sixteen years. I want to know the truth! I deserve it, don't I?"

"Yeah kid, you do." Haymitch took a long swig of his bottle. "She was attacked; killed. We'll never know why because they never caught them. It was between Coin's death and Paylor's election. There was no governing body. There's no way to find out. We'll never know why, and that's the truth."

Peeta felt his eyes burn as he stared out into the night. Haymitch didn't say anything. But he kept drinking. The two male Victors of Twelve remained together in silent contemplation about the Capitol woman they'd both loved. When the next empty bottle clattered to the ground Peeta turned to him.

"Come on Haymitch. Let's get you to bed. It's been a while since you've had that many bottles of hard liquor."

It had been a draining night so the grey eyed man nodded and allowed the younger man to pull him to his feet. The two stumbled their way through the elder's house, the blue eyed man not as steady as he normally was.

At the threshold of his bedroom Haymitch rounded on the blond man and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"She felt the same about you, Peeta. There wasn't anything she wouldn't have done to try and keep you or Katniss safe. She couldn't have loved you anymore than she did. That's why Leo's middle name was Peeta; for you."

Peeta's eyes misted over, but no tear escaped.

Haymitch ruffled the younger's hair and gave him a shove away from the bedroom.

"Goodnight kid."

"Night Haymitch."

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#hayffieweek #angst #haymitchabernathy #effietrinket #hg

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"Papa Mitch!"

Haymitch groaned as the brown hair projectile collided with his legs knocking him into the hospital doorway.

"Bialy Primrose Mellark," Katniss called wearily from the bed, "what have you been told about running in here?"

"To not to," the girl dutifully answer casting her mother a chastised look.

But a cheeky grin was instantly on her face when his grey eyes winked down at her. Only when her mother wasn't looking, of course.

"Congrats Sweetheart," Haymitch offered taking the seat beside Katniss's bed. "Although I haven't seen either boy, so maybe you followed through on your threat when you had this one and killed the boy." Haymitch lifted the girl to sit on his lap. "Is that what happened Munchkin? Did mamma kill daddy and hide the body?"

The four year old's laughter filled the room and Haymitch was still convinced there wasn't a sweeter sound in all the world.

"You're so silly Papa Mitch!"

"Peeta's registering him and his name," Katniss explained.

"What did you two settle on?"

"Ashbey."

"Ashbey what?"

"I don't know. Peeta was still deciding which brother's name he was going to use."

As if summoned, Peeta walked in carrying a bundle with a blue blanket.

"Daddy!"

Haymitch held onto the child to stop her from flying at her father and baby brother.

"Haymitch," Peeta beamed. "I'd like you to meet my son; Ashbey Leonidas Mellark."

"None of your brothers were called Leonidas," Katniss quizzed her husband.

"None of my blood brothers, but my brother of my heart was named Leonidas."

Haymitch was stunned by the boy's gesture. He'd remembered.

Of course he'd remembered, that boy was too good a guy to forget that kind of thing. Still, that was _years_ ago. And in hearing that name again the old man's thoughts went back to the only woman he ever wanted to share these moments with.

She would've been gushing over the baby now. The baby was the image of his father. And that would have had her cooing and making a bunch of ridiculous noises to both father and son.

She would have been so proud of their kids; so proud of who they'd become. Heck, he was proud of them. He could almost see her smile at the thought of him admitting that.

"Papa Mitch, are you crying?"

Haymitch was brought out of thoughts by Bialy's soft question. He was even more surprised to realise she was right.

"Does my baby brother make you sad?" she asked, wiping the tear trailing down his check away.

"Nah, not sad. Your daddy and Squirt there have made me happy. These are happy tears," he explained, trying to use his gruff voice.

But Miss Mellark wasn't fazed by that voice. Instead she put her two small hands on his rough cheeks, forcing him to look in the eye.

"Promise?" she asked, her blue eyes searching his grey ones. "Promise you're happy and not sad? 'Cause you have to say if you're sad!"

Haymitch got lost in her Merchant eyes. They were the wrong shade, but the _right_ colour.

"I promise Munchkin; I'm happy. You guys make me happy."

Her eyes reflected her joy at his happiness. Her blue eyes twinkled at him and for just that moment Haymitch could pretend they were a different shade; different blue eyes twinkling in approval at him.

And Haymitch smiled back.

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;_; Are you glad I changed the day I shared this? Thanks for reading, please take another few moments and let me know what you think. Ta!


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